Monday, October 29, 2007

The choice is yours!!

Either you can have infinite Friends or a girl friend. The choice is yours! It is my personal feeling. And it can be attributed to my bachelor status. (I do not considered 'committed' people as bachelors.) I have seen several cases in my short life ( I am 23), they have bolstered this personal feeling of mine. A person who is very normal, who has no issues in his life. He lives his life as carefree as you and me. He can go out anytime to accompany you. He can even accompany you to the loo because you do not like to go alone anywhere. In short, I mean to say he is very much a part of yours. (From the last line if you are trying to draw any conclusion about my orientation, let me clarify; I am very much straight.) Okay, I will not deviate from the issue. The same person will start behaving differently once he gets a girl into his life. Reason....Let me explore!

Girls have some common habits. I can not list all of them but I would try to emphasize those which can be threats to your personal relationship. When a girl comes to your life; the girl and you both have some expectations from each other.

You have compromised few things for this relationship like you could not sleep well because you were supposed to call her every night and you can not disconnect the phone until and unless she asks you to do the same. If she asks you to disconnect the phone for the first time and you disconnect it, believe me you would be screwed. You do not love her. You would be accused of getting bored. "You were not paying attention to me..."..."You were expecting someones call..."..."who calls you that late.."..."blah...blah???" and you can not escape these questions. Its like a question paper. "All questions are compulsory." You have to have answer them otherwise again the same lecture "It would lead to misunderstanding...and would hamper the firmness of our relationship....we can not expect the same sync...if you do not share these things with me..!"

you do not have any option. You do not have any option?? Ya! you do not have!! You love her and its not a normal affection you love her truly. "saccha pyar!!!!"

This saccha pyar thing is a great excuse. How? I have seen in my life whenever a person is in love with a okay type of girl he will never use the phrase "saccha pyar" maybe he would be using it in front of his girl friend but nowhere else. While if a guy is in love with a girl who is just a non-male, he would be reiterating this "saccha pyar" phrase ad-nauseam. Why? Let me explain. As you know that your girl friend is not a stunning beauty, she is not an academic geek you need to defend your love for her. Your surrounding (I mean friends) would never allow you to bite the bitter gourd. They would always nag you directly or indirectly about her. They would try to divert you to elsewhere. As you are not a foolish even though you are in love, you can understand their insinuations. At that time you would devise a phrase to defend your love. 'Saccha pyar!!' You can not say the world that she is a girl and it is a sufficent reason for me to love someone. It does not sound good. Everyone wants to point out something special. If there is nothing special about your girl Friend then let your love be special for her! And this is how the 'sachha pyaar!!' thing came into existence. For the sake of the phrase ..sorry ..the 'sachha pyaar!!' you answer her all questions as you are appearing for a campus interview. I know that you do not like answering to your father when he asks about your grade points or monthly expenses. You always tell him that it is not easy to manage a grade point of 7.5 or to bring your pocket expenses below 100 rupees per day, but when your girl friend asks, you answer the questions religiously. As you do not want to have some misunderstanding. As you have been told that your honest replies can catapult your relationship to heera-ranjha status.

So how does the phone chatting hampers your personal relationship? It has direct and indirect impact on your relationships. Okay take indirect first.

You talk whole night. Consequently, you sleep whole day if not whole upto midday. You bunk classes, you miss your lunch. And there is no need to mention how important are the dinning table discussions. You discuss everything at the dinning table. Your family, your grudge against opposite sex, you hard feelings with your teachers and everything. As you miss your lunch you miss the dinning table discussion, which heralds all information. So you are not updated about your surrounding. You have also denied the other ways of being informed. Whenever someone comes to your room, he finds the door latched from inside. During night hours, you latch the door to assure an uninterrupted discussion with your girl friend while during day hours you do not want to be disturbed. Your girl friend has wished you 'good night ...sweet dreams..sleep well!!' and you are busy in implementing her wishes (her every wish should come true...apart from this; you also need rest. You are in love so, you are not allowed to be hungry or thirsty but you can feel drowsy). In short, you hardly find sometime for your friends. When you get sometime and sit with your friends, you do not find them as rational as your girl friend. Your friends would be pulling your legs and you are not the sole hero for them but now you have developed a habit to talk about yourself all the time (as you talk about yourself every night), you can not allow someone to denigrate your stature. Another thing is that if your girl friend is a 'sachha pyaar!!' material (non-male), you always feel a threat that someone would start talking about her and you have to defend her again. So to refrain yourself from all these things you start maintaining distance from everyone.

People are also reluctant as you try to force yourself all the time, your sense of humor has been spoiled. (Believe me the first thing which is spoiled in a girl's companion is your sense-of-humor).

Okay what about direct impact??Hmmmmmm..Girls have a habit to rate your friends.

Sunday, May 6, 2007

A Moral Confession II

It is the second part of 'The Moral Confession'.

Yes, the new alok was born! If rahul, rajesh, ravi, abhishek, rishi, aparna, somuya, pallavi, neha could do it why could not I? Probably it was the first time in my life I witnessed the strength of positive attitude। I started taking interest in my classes। I started solving sums. I found that it was not difficult to synchronizing with the teachers. The class was full of dumb students and the teachers really tried hard to help them, to make them understand. I was better than few of them and started picking up pace. I was changing and it had become a source of happiness for me. Though I tried really hard to get noticed by the teachers, it was very difficult. They always had time for the toppers or the dumbos. Mediocres were neglected. I do not blame them I had not done anything praiseworthy as Hrithik Roshan of koi mil gaya did(told some DOS command to his teacher which was not taught to him). And the day I asked my father to buy a new pen for me he was surpried. I hardly demanded any stationery in the last five years. I did not demand even sketch pens as most of the kids do in their kindergartens. At that time Reynolds was launched and I had a crush on it. After all I started studying!! My family members noticed the change within me. Though they did not tell anything I knew they were happy with it.


One day my English teacher called me to the staff room. She was our class teacher. It was the 4th day of the month and I knew that she would discuss my academic report with me. At the end of every month, our respected teachers used to give feedbacks to our class teacher and on the basis of these feedbacks she used to evaluate our class performance. And then one week before parents-teachers meet she used to discuss the report with us. It was her routined job. She wanted to keep an eye on our class performance. Being a class teacher it was her duty and she performed it pretty well. I knew she would diliver the same old speech. "Importance of Education in Our Life." In the last 2 years, I had heard it 20 times. I was quite nervous. As my last encounter with her were not inspiring. She always showed a great concern for our academics. And I did not like it. If I was not doing my maths assignment; why she was getting perturbed? I used to do her assignment religiously. I always wanted to get a good impression in her eyes. I do not know why? But she was the only teacher who made education a sensible thing for me. I could never understand the benefits of education. But she proved its strength for me. I praised her but I was not impressed to such an extent that I had started following her footsteps. Sorry!! I was not prepared for it. The time when she used to talk to me about my academics, a nuclear power plant was installed within me. Her socio-moral lectures were not less than feasible uranium. Its uncontrolled chain reaction filled me with a sense of accountability. I started considering myself as the most important identity of the world. I could visualise my involvement in all sort of development projects. This world could not exist without my presence.It could not progress without my involvement. After every meeting I tried to be sincere and honest. I wanted to contribute to the society. But it was really a tough job. After two days the same old story. All inspirations were vapourised. My friends used to tell me that moral lectures were the most volatile object. I do not know were they right or not? But these lectures can be absorbed easily when it is mixed with a pinch of shame.
I had no another option. So I went to the staff room.
"May I come in mam" I asked.
"oh!!! allllooook come in." She said.
"How are you doing?" She asked.
"mam meeeee...." I asked.
"Yes you!!" she said.
"Mam actually I am feeling well from last few days." I said.
"Why"she asked "I have heard something about you."
"maammm about myself!!!" I said. I was very nervous.
"Alok I am talking to you; am not I?" she interrogated.
"This time teachers have told me that you were taking interest in their classes. You are also doing your assignments regularly." she said.
"But mam!! I always do your assignments. I have written all the essays and letters." I said excitedly.
"yes because you think that I am your class teacher and if you do not complete my assignments, I'll inform your parents about your irregularity." She said. "look, I have every information. What are you doing in others class...what are in doing in recess time ...everything."
I wanted to tell that that it was not the fear of my parents but her attitude which was forcing me to do her assignments. But I could not tell it. I did not know how to say these lines.
After that she informed me about my feedbacks she had got from other teachers. I could witness that she was not complaining. She was happy from the changed alok but she did not want to pronounce it. As it could lead to complacency. But her eloquent smile had communicated everything to me. I was very happy as it was my target to impress my teachers and on the top my english teacher and I had succeeded. Mission Acomplished.

Thursday, May 3, 2007

A Moral Confession I

Christianity has devised an excellent way to remorse. Confession. As per their tenet, one has to confess their crime and you will be forgiven by the almighty. I find it a better way than taking a dip into the holy Ganges. Take a dip into the Ganges and your sins will be dissolved. Does it sound sensible? Is the water of "the holy Ganges" a solvent for sins? So what amount of solute can be dissolved in it? Infinite!! Though chemistry contradicts this principle but we cannot question religious belief. At the same time, we are not forced to believe it or follow it. We can devise our own ways or opt one out of the prevailing options. As I find the Christian's way an appropriate one. I go for it.
What can be a better place than the World wide web to confession something. The time one goes to church he shares his misdeed with a gospel. While I am sharing it with the whole world. Yes today I am going to confess a very old crime committed by me. At that time I neither had an idea about the strength of truth nor about the resentment of immoral activities.


I was in class fourth. Since my childhood, I am a poor student (in terms of academics). Sometimes, some of my friends who are not performing well at present say that they were very good students in their respective schools. This institute could not recognize their talents and they have suffered. Once when I was in class third, a very close friend of mine told me that he used to stand first when he was in lower kindergarten. After that something happened to him, he might have faced some hardship (I do not think it would be due to a girl because at our time kids were not smart enough to capitalise on the opportunities they get during their childhood) and he started getting two or three crosses (In our school when someone fails to get forty out of hundred teachers call it a cross and love to humiliate the student) on an average in every exam. But I never had such a history. I have never been a source of inspiration for anyone. During my schooldays, alok was a synonym for born-looser. In the beginning, teachers always got a good start for themselves. As on the basis of roll number, I was among the first four students of my class (I really enjoyed to be among the privelegeds, all due to my parents who christened me alok, all due to the alphabet 'A' ). On every judgement day, I was the first who was beaten like anything. Believe it or not they used to beat black and blue. But after few days, I started getting concessions in punishments. Most probably they would have incurred the belief that my personality could not imbibe even a single sign of civilization.

But a new thing started. Now the teachers started sketching my personality as an adult franchise. I had big dreams and I was very sure that at 20 I would conquer the world. But my teachers had no clue of my future plans and according to them my present performance was the mirror image of my future (at that time i did not know that it would be a virtual image). They designed a time machine and offered free rides to me now and then. They had shown me my future. What I would be doing after 15 years, what sort of defame I would be claiming, how much grief my parents had to bear due to me and all that. Though they did it with an honorable intention, I was too immature to understand its implications. They used to reiterating the same lines whenever they got a chance to talk about me. Their endeavours did not go in vain within few days my dreams started shattering. I could figure out the crisis. I could not sleep properly neither in classroom nor at home. Nightmares!! I was sitting in the examination hall and I did not know even a single answer. My friends were scribbling incessantly. I woke up and found myself in my bed. I realised that it was a nightmare and took a deep breath. It had become a regular show. As regular as the Saas-bahu soap at star plus.It became clear to me that I need improvement. Now the question was how? How could I improve myself? One day I was sleeping in the night and after a routined late-night-nightmare-show I woke up. I tried to remember about the dream (it had some pleasant contents), I remembered that I got a chirag. It was akin to that of Aladin. I rubbed the chirag. Jeenie appeared. I asked him to perform some task which i exactly did not remember (but i am very much sure it was not an illicit task,as I do not want a supernatural to be my accomplice, they are made for bigger jobs). Jeenie disappeared and before he could reappear I woke up. I regretted for not being that lucky to get a chirag. I have a tendency to blame my fate for anything and everything which goes wrong with me.

I knew that the chirag was not a practical solution for getting rid from the present crisis. Its time to amend myself. Though I knew that it would demand great conviction, I was determined. No more knee-downs, no more hands-ups, no more get-out-of-the-class, no more insults, no more moral lectures, No more insinuations no more that lethargic-irregular-careless-shameless worthless alok.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Lets add "bhenja fry" to bollywood menu card!

As always. It was friday and I was planing to go for a movie. Unfortunately I could not find anyone. As my fixed partner had an interview. And the names of new releases didnot excite anyone to take a chance. I had no option except postponing my plan. On saturday we went for bheja fry.
Bheja fry. The name had a feel. Though nowadays its not difficult to find absurd titles in bollywood. Like the names of Mithun's movies. For example; Dhoti ko phad ke rumaal kar de, Gundon ka gunda etc. But it was not an absurd title for me. It was a title which had a message. A distinct message. One could easily figure out that this movie was not a typical bollywood movie.

It was a saturday afternoon. As only one multiplex was screening this movie so we were forced to catch a show which was scheduled at 1410 hours. Under the smouldering sun we marched towards the multiplex. As per our expectation there was a thin crowd. As usual the star cast was not sufficient to attract people.
The movie was simply awesome. A handmade movie with a single line screen play. The idea was unique and it was well complimented by the screen play and the actors. Sagar Ballary, director of the movie had treated it very well. The humor was light and stainless. We chuckled and sometimes bursted into guffaws. A pure entertainer. We need more bheja fries!!

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Who has "provoked" me?

Yesterday I went to watch the new release named provoked. I always have an inclination towards these offbeat movies. Though I am not convinced with the tag "offbeat" these are the movies which are based on genuine human emotions. How one can call it offbeat? I want to promote these directors and producers who have the courage to put their effort and money in such projects. Projects which are not able to attract viewers as they are unable to relate themselves with such scripts. I donot know the percentage of Indians who can relate themselves with the romantic scripts. How many of us have experienced the pain, agony and power of love? As we hear in few hindi movies "Zindagi mein sirf ek bar hi sacha pyar milta hai." How many of us have got that sacha pyar? So this logic is completely wrong that we can not relate ourselves with these offbeat movies. We can say that they donot allow us to dream. To dream big. As we can do in SRK-type movies (excluding swades). We can dream about flirting with girls, cladding in Armani, playing tricks with underworld and having a life which is almost impossible for a mortal.

Provoked which is based on the true story (read it as mishap) of a punjabi girl named kiranjit ahluwalia. The fact which provoked me to watch this movie was the director, Jag Mundhra.His last movie was bawandar. I missed that movie. Though it could not work at box office it drew everyone's eyes towards Jag Mundhra. The way he treated the script was hair-raising. He did not dilute the intensity of incidents (captured in the movie). Though it was called vulgar he did not care for it. He knew that it was necessary for the movie. Nandita das supported him very well. Who can challenge her audacity?
Provoked which starts with a candle is committed to enlighten the society. As the protagonist has already been recognised by the british government for the courage she has shown. It has nothing new. The same stale husband-wife fracas, woman's suffering and woman's emancipation. But the message it propagates is worth noticing. Woman is not respected due to its anatomy but they owe respect due to their heart and soul.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

15 Feb- Bachelorhood Frustation Day.

15th February has been declared as Bachelorhood Frustation Day. Those who have not got any valentine on 14th of this month (somebody calls it valentines day) are requested to participate in the grand celebration of this day.
Our aim is to alleviate the pain of those who suffered alot due to this day. This black day has bloomed plethora of desires. And every desire of a human being cannot be fulfilled. Consequently, one encounters sorrow and remorse. But we are providing you a drive-it-in-your-way formula. We are not providing you a graveyard to bury your desires but we are committed to rekindle them.
Not trying to dope your hope!
just trying to express the truth.
We shall overcome one day,
the belief in my heart.
Join us to celebrate Bachelorhood Frustation Day!!